Shannon S. McKee

musings and moments

Cultivating Gratitude During a Pandemic

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Joy is always possible as long as thanks is possible — and there is always, always, always something to be thankful for. ~ Ann Voskamp

As news started to break about the CoVid-19 pandemic last week, I could feel an ache rising in my soul. Not so much a fear of the virus itself but a deep, down ache for all of the ripples that I could see happening around me. For the people whose livelihoods would suffer greatly during the days of quarantine. For my daughter whose Senior Year is being thrown into oblivion without warning. For the singles in our church family for whom social distancing might mean going home to an empty house. For the recovering addicts in our church who rely (in part) on accountability and staying busy to help them stay sober. For the people who are quarantined with an abuser instead of loving family. For the nonprofits and churches who will surely see a dip in being able to provide their usual services. For the people who are afraid or at risk. For the young bride who is deciding what to do about her May wedding celebration. For the many servant-minded nurses I know who are on the front lines of this. For my shepherd-hearted pastor husband who is adding this to his list of “things they don’t teach you at seminary.”

The burden feels heavy. At one point in the week, the weight of trying to process all of those situations was overwhelming to me. Like I could feel it in my body and I was shutting down. People tell me that it’s because I’m a bit of an empath. I don’t know why it took me these many years into my adult life to understand that about myself but, there you have it.

spiritual formation gratitude journalWhat I do know is that my way forward out of that funk is to regroup and refocus. I can make a choice: dwell on the hard things and bear that burden myself OR look to the One who holds all things in His hands and is in the business of making all things new. I can acknowledge the hurt and the suffering without letting it crush me. I can surrender. The circumstances of this pandemic are not within my control. Often times, we think we’re in control when we’re really not. With this one, there isn’t even a little pretense of control. I don’t like these circumstances, but I have no ability to control them and they are unlikely to change in the near future. But what I can control is my response to the circumstances. I can look for God’s gifts in the midst of these difficult days. I can recall the beautiful things about my God in His Word and offer Him praise for His unchanging, steadfast character. I can remember all the past gifts and faithfulnesses – He has been giving good gifts to a stubborn and rebellious people for thousands of years. I can look forward to a God whose mercies are new every single morning. New day. New Mercies. Same faithful God.

So, I revived a practice that I had done years ago when Ann Voskamp’s book One Thousand Gifts came out – counting the gifts in a journal. I guess I never totally stopped doing it… but I wasn’t nearly as faithful and I certainly wasn’t intentionally writing them down anywhere. Life and ministry have been hard these last 10 years or so. I was surviving but not always thirving. And, somewhere in there, purposefully counting gifts just sort of slipped off the radar.

About a month ago, God brought it back to mind as I was preparing to speak at a weekend retreat on Joy. And, then a week ago when I was feeling the weight of things shutting down in Ohio, He nudged me to lead our Redemption Chapel women to do the same thing.

And, just like that, we were having an impromptu Redemption Chapel Women’s Ministry Week of Thanksgiving. Each day I sent them a new prompt, a verse about thankfulness, and shared a tiny bit of my heart. Right there amidst of all the stupid memes and slanted news and political maneuvering and scary updates, in our little corner of the internet, a group of 300 or so women “gathered” to recount the gifts. New ones every day. And it was beautiful. In my mind’s eye, I imagine that it was like a big bowl of incense wafting up to God – offered on the altar of our lives in worship to Him.

The official “week of Thanksgiving” is over but I’m encouraging our women to continue on their own. Because this is a good practice. Not only does it glorify our God but it is GOOD FOR US. The science backs it up. The habit of intentionally cultivating gratitude and recalling it can help you: feel less depressed, stir up positive emotions, sleep better, reduce stress, express more compassion and kindness, and even have stronger immune systems. Doing it consistently actually reprograms your brain and makes it easier to see the gifts as a way of life – not just when you’re in crisis mode but all the time. Go figure – looking to and giving thanks to the Giftgiver is good for our souls… hmmm.

Maybe you’ll join us?

If you’re having trouble getting the gratitude muscle moving and you need some help, Ann Voskamp’s book is a gem. Her website also has a Joy Dare which gives you prompts each month for keeping your gratitude list. I have also heard wonderful things about Jennie Allen’s new book, Get Out of Your Head. (I haven’t read it myself yet so I’m giving it a tentative endorsement based on other reviewers I trust.)

If you just want to get started without links or books, here are some potential journaling prompts that might help get you thinking:

  • Something that made you smile today
  • A Simple pleasure
  • Something funny that made you laugh
  • Your favorite thing when you wake up in the morning
  • Something you are good at doing
  • An accomplishment you’re proud of
  • What did you enjoy the most today?
  • A favorite place you like to visit
  • An act of kindness someone showed you
  • A gift that is particularly meaningful
  • A book you are grateful for reading
  • What weather are you grateful for today?
  • Modern inventions you are thankful for
  • Something you take for granted
  • Favorite things you like about your job or work
  • Something you learned about recently
  • Someone who made a positive difference in your life
  • A favorite activity you enjoy doing
  • Day of the week – What’s your favorite thing about Mondays? Fridays? The Weekend?
  • Favorite websites you are grateful for
  • Favorite author, artist, or musician
  • Something that makes your life easier
  • Favorite food you enjoy
  • Something you use every single day
  • Something you appreciate in nature
  • Something you wear that makes you feel good {clothes, jewelry, makeup, etc.}
  • Something that keeps you warm
  • Something that helps you relax
  • Something that you’re looking forward to
  • Something that you have today that you didn’t have a year ago
  • A happy memory
  • Someplace you’ve been
  • Something about your body or health
  • Something or someone that makes you feel safe
  • A way you are able to help other
  • A friend
  • A teacher or mentor
  • A tradition
  • A mistake or failure

Here’s to counting the gifts together – even in the midst of uncertainty.

Grace and peace to you as you do.

How to Choose a Commentary for Personal Bible Study

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I was recently asked some good questions about how I study the Bible and how I prepare to teach books of the Bible. Part of that question involved the tools I use – like commentaries. I thought I’d take a sec to offer a few thoughts about commentaries in general and which ones I use.

A Disclaimer

Let me start by saying that a commentary is NOT necessary to your personal study of the Bible. A Bible commentary can be used to SUPPLEMENT your personal study. It should not be used INSTEAD of personal study. Since the commentary itself is not Scripture, it’s important for the studier to weigh what she reads against other sources, as well as her own Spirit-led pondering. A good commentary represents hundreds and hundreds of hours of painstaking study and research in the original languages. It is certainly to be cherished as the considered opinion/interpretation of scholarly, Jesus-loving men and women. But, it is NOT infallible like the Scripture itself.

Of course, you’re not infallible either so getting the input of others can be helpful. Especially when you read something that is confusing at first glance. Sitting down with your pastor or spiritual mentor can be a form of commentary. That is healthy and good. I’m definitely NOT against commentaries. I just want to always encourage us toward personal study first. God’s Word was intended for the common, everyday person. His desire was to share His heart and reveal His grand story to us. Not to hide things from us or further confuse us! He didn’t make it so tricky that we can’t catch it’s basic meaning by opening it up and just reading it. So, first, try to read it on your own. Sit with your question for a day or three. Pray about it. Speak it aloud when you’re alone in the car. Journal about it. Bounce it off of a friend or group of friends. AFTER you have done that hard work yourself, feel free to go consult a good commentary.

Now, I realize that some of you may be asking, what the heck is a commentary?

To answer that, I’m going to borrow from the gotquestions.org website: “A Bible commentary is a series of notes explaining the meaning of passages of Scripture. A commentary may explain the language used in a section of text. Or it may discuss the historical background. Almost all commentaries attempt to explain the passage in terms of some system of theology. In other words, the commentary is an explanation of how the Bible fits together and what it means. Since a Bible commentary is written by human authors, it will reflect the beliefs and perspective of those writers.”

If you have a study Bible, those little notes in the margins are a form of commentary because they further explain the original text. You can also buy a separate, more in-depth commentary that covers certain sections of the Bible.

How do I decide which commentaries I’ll use?

Commentaries are usually categorized according to their purpose:  technical (for in-depth exegetical study), pastoral (for sermon prep), and devotional (for personal study). There are no points for picking a technical commentary to look smart or scholarly. They’re usually more expensive and most of us just don’t need to go that heady. Rather, the majority of us probably need the devotional or pastoral commentary, not the technical one. I often pick a pastoral one, since I’m preparing to teach.

When I go to teach a book of the Bible, I buy 2-3 individual commentaries.  To choose them, I consult three sources:

  1. I ask our pastors at Redemption Chapel. Listen, if I don’t trust these men and their direction on trusted sources, then I shouldn’t be going to this church. We have three godly pastors at our church. They love God’s Word and seek to diligently handle it accurately, so their input on commentaries is invaluable.
  2. I check Tim Challies’ blog. He is a pastor who has curated a list of every book of the Bible and has recommended 4 or 5 commentaries for all 66 books of the Bible. He also explains which ones are more technical and which ones are more “readable” for someone (like me) who isn’t a scholar in the original languages of the Bible (Hebrew, Greek, and Aramaic).
  3. I check the bestcommentaries.com website for recommendations. This helpful website is a little like Challies’ site in that it rates commentaries and provides commentary rankings for each book of the Bible. It’s more extensive and has less prose than Challies’ lists. It also has lists, or “featured libraries,” from pastors and authors.

As a general rule, these sets offer reputable devotional commentaries: NIV Application Commentary, New Bible Commentary, The Bible Speaks Today, God’s Word For You series, and The New Testament for Everyone.

If you’re in doubt, by all means reach out to a mentor or spiritual leader in your life. If you’re a woman at Redemption Chapel, I’m happy to review a resource for you and give you my two cents. I’ll be honest, you truly can’t trust everything you read. Just because it sold well on Amazon doesn’t mean it handles God’s Word accurately! And since commentaries can be expensive, you definitely want to do your homework before you buy something. If you live local, my friend Ann at Logos Bookstore in Kent is always happy to help you order something and often offers a 20% off coupon or two in her quarterly newsletter.

I hope that helps. Happy studying, friends. I pray you will never grow weary of applying yourself to the study of God’s Word.

This & That: A Recipe for Egg Roll in a Bowl

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Over the course of the last year or so, I’ve been adding new whole food recipes to our family repertoire of recipes. As you may know from one of his recent sermons, one of Rick’s favorites is this one – a one-pan dinner made in less than 30 minutes. It is packed with protein and flavor. I make it with ground pork but I have heard of others who use ground beef. I initially heard of the recipe from the first Trim Healthy Mama cookbook but I made a few tweaks when I was doing the Whole 30 (namely swapping out the soy sauce and replacing it with liquid aminos. I also added the bag of Mann’s Power Blend – it’s a mixture of super greens like kale and brussel sprouts. I get it in the produce section at Marc’s here in Northeast Ohio but I believe it is also available at Wal-Mart. I’m no expert but I believe the recipe is also Keto compliant.

It tastes just like an egg roll but without the deep fried egg roll wrapper. If you try it, be sure to come back and let me know what you think!

Egg Roll in a Bowl

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Servings 4 people

Ingredients
  

  • 3 tbsp sesame oil
  • 2 lbs ground pork
  • 2 medium onions, chopped
  • 6 cups red cabbage, finely shredded (about 1 medium head)
  • 1 bag Mann's Power Blend ®
  • 2 tsps ginger, ground
  • 1/3 cup liquid aminos
  • 4 cloves garlic, minced
  • Black pepper, to taste
  • 1 pinch mineral salt
  • 4 green onions, finely chopped
  • sesame seeds, optional
  • red pepper flakes, optional

Instructions
 

  • Brown the ground pork in large frying pan until fully cooked.
    Turn heat to medium-high and add chopped onion (not the green onions yet) and sesame oil, increase heat to lightly brown the onions.
  • In a small bowl, mix together the garlic, ginger and liquid aminos and add to pan, and then immediately add the sliced cabbage and the bag of Mann's Power Blend. Stir.
    Cook for a few minutes, stirring often, so that it doesn't burn and so all cabbage slightly wilts and reduces in size.
  • Turn off heat, add salt and black pepper to taste, stir one last time and serve warm.
    Serve with chopped green onions, red pepper flakes and sesame seeds as optional garnish.

Notes

Same great taste you’ll get in an eggroll, minus the deep fried wrapper.So MUCH healthier!

Naming the Beauty {My Mother’s Day Aha Moment}

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This weekend, the kids treated me to brunch out. As is our McKee family habit, part of the time was spent affirming the person being honored. In this case, it was me because of Mother’s Day. Rick asked the kids how they would describe me to their own children someday if something happened and I were to die before those little people ever get know me. 

I’m not gonna lie. It was a really special moment for me. Maybe on the highlight reel of my life so far. I’ve been trying to wrap my head around why it meant so very much to me. I mean, they’ve all affirmed me before. But for some reason this conversation really struck a deep place in my heart. 

I’m going to share some of my reflections on it here because I think it might be instructive in how we love others as well. 

First, I think part of the reason it resonated so much is that I realized in that moment that I really am known by my family. When you are in the throes of raising kids and maintaining a refuge, it can feel like no one really sees you. For one thing, a lot of what you do is behind the scenes. But, also, I often feel like the oddball in my family. I’m less witty and way more awkward than the three of them. I like quiet and calm. They are all three more busy and aggressive than me. But, in this moment around the brunch table, I realized that I play an important part in the family dynamic too. One that they all do see and appreciate. 

Secondly, Rick’s question took it out of the “thanks for being such a great mom to me” category and put it into the “here’s what I really like about who you are” category. It’s a small change but it really meant a lot to me. My kids are thankful for WHO I am as a person. A person who also happens to be their mom. The things they listed weren’t really focused on WHAT I do for them. They said things like, “I’ve learned to pause and notice the world around me because of you” and “you have a great imagination and childlike wonder about you” and “you are just really kind and sweet and like to make peace” and “I like that you’re a good thinker and can talk about all kinds of things”. They said that they’d want to tell their kids about how I used to read out loud to them with different voices for the characters. And how I love to color in coloring books, and read Winnie the Pooh, or watch Anne with an e. 

They did also note the ways I sacrifice for them; so I’m not saying that the DO was totally disconnected from their thoughts of me as a mom. Of course, we live out our WHO as we DO. But, it felt really intimate and powerful to me to feel seen and known beyond just what I do for them. They described me pretty well, actually.  

Third, as they were sharing, I realized that I am hyper-focused on the ways in which I need to grow. I’m always striving, focused on where I fall short of my perceived perfect, Christian woman. I beat myself up a lot. Granted, it’s not all bad to know your blindspots or to be aware of your shortcomings or own your sin. And even to work on those things in cooperation with the Holy Spirit. But, for me, I think I over focus there and miss what God is doing in my life that is beautiful and good. 

What if, instead, I learned to revel in how God made me? Not in pride – because He is the author and designer of who I am. He is the one who gives good gifts and fashions us – the Bible refers to Him as the potter and me as the clay! The glory is still His. But, how nice would it be to be so comfortable in my own skin that I can humbly acknowledge the beauty along with flaws, bumps, and bruises? As Paul said in his letter to the Romans (12:3), I am to “think of [myself] with sober judgement, in accordance with the measure of faith God has given [me].” He put me into this world because He wants me to be here – not the “me I think I should because of how He made someone else and I think she is more ideal than me.” 

In his book, Crafting a Rule of Life, Stephen A. Macchia said it this way: 

“In truth, we cannot become anything other than who we already are, if we wish to be fulfilled in our lives and vocation. We must stop trying to “become” something else, or to “develop” or “cultivate” some trait that we fundamentally lack, and instead start by being who we already are by identifying our giftedness and living it out. 

Our gifts and talents all come from the hand of almighty God. We can’t claim them as our own, as if we created or designed them by ancestry or practice… We acknowledge our true selves when we appreciate the way that God made us.”

Honestly, I don’t think I’m there yet. Years of fearing failure and being a people pleaser have made my inner world a little messy at times. But, Saturday morning was a really rich and powerful time in my journey of spiritual formation. 

Which got me thinking about how I can do this for others. I want to give this same gift to the people in my life. To be a finder of beauty in others and to help them name it. 

Because I don’t think I’m alone in struggling to always see it in myself.